beating dead horsies...

[Ben Waggoner]

On Wed, 13 Dec 1995, Murray Fletcher wrote:

> On Tue, 12 Dec 1995, Timothy S. Ross wrote:
>
> >         The "Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Horse Carcasses"
> > (SPCHC) regrets a portion of a message recently posted on Taxacom.  Ever
> > since the days of the Roman Empire, horse corpses have been unnecessarily
> > flogged ("Equi stiffi multi-smackati sunt...").  On behalf of dead horses
> > everywhere, might we suggest that another mammal be chosen.  Warm fuzzies
> > that seem to escape this oppression include wombats, echidnas, galagoes,
> > agoutis, kinkajous, okapis, wolverines, aye-ayes, binturongs, margays,
> > gnus, elephant shrews, potoes, pandas, pangolins, and alpacas, to name a
> > few.  Your consideration of this matter will be greatly appreciated.
> >                                         Mammalially Yours,
> >                                           The SPCHC.
> >
>
> Actually, pangolins make good floggers with which to flog dead horses,
> although platypuses/platypi/platypods or beavers are better.
>
As a representative of the Society for the Circumvention of All Mauling of
Pangolins (formerly the Society for the Prevention of All Ridicule of
Xenarthra) I would like to convey my displeasure at the suggestion that
the noble and endangered beast known as the pangolin should be used as
an equine flogger. Pangolins were recently classified in the Useful Animalia
and as such need protection from abuse, as befits their taxonomic status,
despite the fact that no two scientists anywhere can agree on the proper
Latin pronunciation of its scientific name. Or even remember what it is
two days out of three. Anyway, pangolins have suffered enough, especially
since being roasted and eaten in large quantities by John the Baptist,
and I must request that the readership of TAXACOM show more consideration
for this noble creature.

Sincerely,

Ben Waggoner
Dept. of Integrative Biology
University of California
Berkeley, CA 94720 USA
bmw at uclink2.berkeley.edu